Alberta is the land of large pickup trucks. Well, perhaps you live on a farm and you need to haul stuff around or tow tractors out of a muddy ditch. Maybe you need the ruggedness of a truck of this stature to transport you to and from a wellsite up North with a wireline rig in tow. Or could it be that you are a contractor and your equipment needs to get around safely? No, probably not. It is more likely that you are simply a prick with a huge truck who drives around as though you are the master of the road you survey far, far beneath you. So if you drive a truck that even remotely resembles the one pictured below:

You have to be kidding me. Just the other day while traveling south on Rocky Ridge Road, I thought for a moment we were experiencing a solar eclipse because
all of the sudden my vehicle was blanketed by darkness. But this was no eclipse, my friends, the shadow that swallowed my car was cast by the monstrosity pictured in this post. I know my vehicles, but I couldn’t figure out what the fuck this thing was. First I thought it was the front end of a semi trailer setup, but no 5th wheel type hitch. So I figured it was some sort of military setup, but nope, it had no markings that would suggest so.

Seriously. It is even faster the lower it is to the ground. Did you know that stickers somehow also increase your car’s speed and improve its handling? Well, now you know. And if you want to make the people driving behind you very happy, make sure to slow down to roughly 5 km/h to cross [...]